Spring-cleaning: Soul Edition
This time of the year is dedicated to getting things in order around the house by cleaning, de-cluttering and organizing. We clean the baseboards, get rid of clothes that we haven’t worn in years and organize the bottom of the bathroom sink. Therefore, we spend countless hours on the appearance of our home but can the same be said about our lives. Hi friends, it’s me Felicia and I want to share my take on cleansing your soul.
The first five months of this year have been a challenge. As a result I lost sleep, weight and peace of mind. Unlike other challenging times in my life instead of stepping up to the plate I threw in the towel. Never in my life have I ever felt this way and I have always prided myself on the fact that I could get through any challenge or hardship. Well…..this was different. I was struggling and I told my husband that I felt like I was drowning. At the time I didn’t understand but as I continue to journey through this season of my life it’s purpose has become clear. To sum it up in one word: Freedom.
In order to be free I knew it would require help. One of my favorite verses in the Bible is John 8:36: so if the Son sets you free, you are free indeed. Therefore, as a believer I am free from spiritual death because I have accepted Christ into my heart. What does spiritual death mean? It means sin in my life that separates me from the love of the Father. Jesus came to give life not death. See John 10:10. Sin such as unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, pride and self-reliance began to rear their heads because of the challenges in my life. I felt numb and I remember coming home, climbing in the bed and sleeping. The next morning when I woke up the issues were still there but I was not ready to face them. My sweet husband told me to rest but not your typical rest. He meant the kind of rest where I have no choice but to give my brokenness to my Savior and trust that He could handle it.
So now I was on the hunt for rest. In addition to finding rest my soul I needed rest for my physical body as well. As most moms I get caught in the rat race of doing and going. As a result I had to leave my home to start the healing process. I grabbed some Chick fil-A and headed to a Wyndham hotel. It was me, my Father, my Savior, my thoughts, my Bible and my journal. The stay at the hotel became the launching pad for my journey of rest. Unlike any other time in my life I have been forced to examine where I am, what I am doing and processing where I want to go. I have not figured it all out but I have settled upon some truths. Those truths led me back to that “F” word: Freedom.
So what is freedom and how can continue to walk in it?
- Forgiveness is the first step to freedom. Christ models this for us as believers and we must do the same. Unforgiveness will take root in your heart and rob you of peace and joy. It must be uprooted in order for us to live the life that Christ is calling us too. If not we will remain stuck in the hurt and disappointment.
- Freedom is a mindset that starts with knowing my identity in Christ. I am not subject to other people’s expectation, pressures, opinions or boxes. Christ says that we are loved, chosen, forgiven and we have a purpose. Allow that to sink into your soul.
- Freedom is a choice that I must decide upon daily. Being stuck…frozen in the last disappointment or mistake will prevent you from reaching your full potential. Christ has taken care of past mistakes, hurts and disappointments. Rest in that and make the choice to keep moving forward everyday.
I couldn’t have come to those truths if I would have remained busy and occupied with life. Silence: the absence of noise, distractions, opinions and social media. I needed to be silent, accept silence and sit in it. It is oftentimes difficult to do this when you are accustomed to always being on the run and doing tasks. Psalm 37:7a says Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him. Be still and wait….how many of us moms can do this? Is this even possible being a mom? The answer is yes and we must. I made a commitment to reading my Word and praying. It was during this stillness and silence that I could feel His love washing over me and assuring me that He is with me and that He never left. His plans are sure and they have not changed. So daily I make it a priority to be still and wait. I’ve learned that I need do this throughout the day as well because sometimes I forgot that He is in control and I am not. I encourage you to take time for silence and watch how He will fill and fuel you for any season that you may be facing.
As I continue on this journey I choose to renew my mind with His Word and through prayer. Therefore, instead of isolating myself I see a therapist and I am intentional about fostering community. Allow yourself to sit and be silent so that He can speak to your heart. Be encouraged friend, this type of cleaning might actually be purging which in turn will produce fruit that will impact your life forever. See John 15:1-8.
As I mentioned earlier my commitment to reading the Word and praying increased. As a result I have listed the supplies that are now staples in my journey.
Scriptures that fed my soul:
- Stability: Psalm 62:7
- Perspective: Hebrews 12:1-2
- Purpose: Colossians 3:17
- Promise: Romans 8:28
- Peace: Philippians 5:6-7
Songs that spoke truth:
- Passion: “Bigger than I thought”
- Lauren Daigle: “Rescue”
- Bethel Music: “God I look to you”